Friday, May 19, 2006

Forget About Ghosts In The Machine

I have one on the side of my dresser.

Omar impugned my good name on his blog by calling me out to provide photographic evidence of the scary chihuahua face embedded in the wood grain of my bureau. As if this ghostly little apparition isn't frightening enough, he has an upside down twin located a little further down the panel. I refuse to sleep on the side of the bed closest to the bureau. Papi just laughs at me.

It all started one day while perusing the bedroom sets at Houston's very own Gallery Furniture. Papi and I were making out on all the beds, trying to decide which one we should take home that would accommodate us the best. Kidding. We selected Hooker brand. That's right, we are the proud owners of Hooker Furniture. No, it didn't include a vibrating, rotating bed with mirrored panels nor a nice four poster design for tying something or someone to. However, I was a little surprised at the financing terms. We make payments by the hour instead of the traditional monthly terms.

You know how people purchase things and justify it by remarking, "I don't know. It just kind of spoke to me?" I fear that's what happened with this particular bedroom ensemble. Maybe, the chihuahua face raspily spoke to me on a subconscious level that persuaded me to choose this certain dresser. I am scary chihuahua face's, "Chosen One". Omar, do they offer special furniture exorcism instruction at your woodworking classes?

9 comments:

wendela said...

This is the image I've been waiting to see after you wrote about it at Omar's. Wow, it exists! It would probably fetch more on e-bay than his tomato. I know I couldn't sleep next to the scary chihuahua face or its upside down twin. You and papi are brave.

omar said...

Wow. I'm sorry I ever doubted you. And I'm sorry you have to sleep with that face staring at you. We haven't covered furniture exorcism yet in my woodworking class, but I'll ask the teacher next time, and I'll let you know.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

That's one of the reasons that we never skip our nightly prayers!

You need to hurry Omar as the situation grows more grave. Now that this photo has been widely publicized it has found itself circulating throughout The Fraternal Order Of The Sacred Chihuahua. I can't afford to lose the usage of my bedroom because they want to cordon it off in order to accommodate the millions making a pilgrimage to my house to touch the chihuahua face on the bureau and take pictures of it. Although, I could potentially make a few bucks out of this.

jams o donnell said...

I found your blog after some disparaging comments were made about a post you put up on Further Left blog then noticing you are linked to Pisces Iscariot's blog.

Very enjoyable and entertaining it is!

Mimo- JenK said...

EWL, are you sure the chihuahua isn't telling you to eat Taco Bell?

Garth said...

I live in a house where much of the inside is exposed wood, so there are hundreds of Knotty faces looking out - I try to ignore them... but the voices... the voices...

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Hallo Jams. Yes, silly me, barging into the left forum den and riling up the gators. Admit it though, it more than likely spiced things up around there and gave everybody something to talk about. Apparently, Pisces finds people who garner "disparaging comments", irresistible!

I would have seen the face as Rudolph carrot, if it weren't for the distinctive voice saying, "Yo quiero Taco Bell."

So you live in a home with "exposed wood", do you, Pisces? ;-) And, it "speaks to you". Surprise, surprise.

I've watched all the Scooby Doo movies miss biotech. Facing something like the scary chihuahua is nothing by comparison

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I'm bringing in the Pet Psychic for guidance and help lianne.

Bill C said...

Definitely can't unplug this "puppy."