Wednesday, December 05, 2007

And Now For Another Exciting Edition Of Stevie Wonders

Today Stevie Wonders.......
Why the cost of maintaining a Part-Time Lover has skyrocketed so much over the years.

See, his Part-Time Lover joined a Part-Time Lovers Union and they demanded a set of Starbucks-like employee rights that guarantee all workers a comprehensive medical/dental plan, 401K, and bonuses.

Sadly, Stevie's Part-Time Lover isn't even all that reliable either. And I quote:

"Ive got something that I must tell
Last night someone rang our doorbell
And it was not you my part-time lover"

Poor Stevie is still preoccupied with 1985. Back then part-time lovers flowed free and plentiful.

What about all the illegal immigrants we keep hearing about in the media who are willing to do the jobs "that no American will do?" Perhaps thats the solution to the part-time lover inflationary problems. Surely Stevie can find one cheap to fulfill the position of Part-Time Lover, right?

*Knowing its so wrong for feeling so right over at humorblogs.com*

33 comments:

glittersmama said...

Huh? I was never very good at philosophy.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Its simple. Good, reliable, discreet part-time lovers are just so hard to find these days. Stevie was in his Part-Time Lover heyday back in 1985 but now a lot of ladies want to be added on only as full time help.

Pity him.

Melissa said...

I can't say that I blame the ladies really... I wish I belonged to a union that could regulate the hours I work ;)
I will try to pity him, but it's hard to pity someone who is rich. I know, totally prejudice of me, but, there it is.

Nancy Face said...

Only you could think of this, haha! Ingenious, I say! :D

Jean Knee said...

I thought part-time lovers were called something else.

Bee said...

So yeah ummmm he must looking in the wrong place cuz I see some part time lovers walking around all the time. Oh wait... I said looking EUREKA!! He's blind. Not that there's anything wrong with that!


jean knee what are they called??

click from work-ish (the "ish" is added because yes I'm at work and no I'm not working)

whodatgurl said...

I thought I had a part-time lover, actually he only wanted to deliver my paper. What's up with that?

Jean Knee said...

I want a part-time electric bill

Sketchy said...

I think Jean Knee has not gotten the Part time Lovers PC training course. Those other words are so demeaning.

...and accurate.

Who wants that?

on.the.run said...

Stevie Wonder is a little creepy - it's a wonder he can get any lover much less one that want to commit to full time.

Theoretical Grammatarian said...

So many jobs are being outsourced these days to India, but I'm not sure if Part-Time Lover is really a position that translates to telecommuting. Maybe he could set up an employee sharing program where he could buy in on someone else's Part-Time Lover and split the costs?

Suzanne said...

Ahh...sounds of the 80's! :)

wynne said...

*gasps* I had no idea that was what the song was about! I always thought Stevie was such a nice boy.

And hey--this has nothing to do with anything, but look what happens if you change just TWO vowels:
Lover and unions
becomes
Liver and onions

Yum?

jams o donnell said...

If Stevie still wants a part time lover I am sure he could afford to pay a decent wage. He should stick to just one part time lover - having two or more lovers on job-share usually ends in a lot of recriminations and no part time lovers at all.

He could substitute for an outsources call centre lover but there is something pretty tacky about paying them $6 a minute via a 1-900 number!

Dan said...

I request consideration for this position of part-time lover of which you speak. My long list of references is available upon request.

Did you ever wonder why Stevie wonders so much?

Lisa said...

I don't know what is wrong with me, but I think every old song had meaning I wasn't aware of back then.

Annie said...

You actually got Dan to pay a second visit to your blog?! I would take him up on his offer. You can have him fetch the remote for you or pump your gas.

aubrey said...

mm, i like this video. and this song. prettyness.

PJ said...

Milk, gas and part-time lovers.

Bee said...

NO MOONLIGHT TODAY??? Porque??


2 clickys one from work one from home.

Bee said...

They're gonna sing covers to soundtracks!!! COME ON!

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

I fired my part-time lover when I found out he was working full-time. Fer rude!!

Bee said...

You know what? I just saw a little preview of this "Movies that Rock" and they've sucked! (uh... can I say "sucked"?) Anyway, I'm gonna take one for the team and watch that crap just so I can complain about it! (it turns out I'm bored and tired of complaining about other stuff I need something new) (new and on my terms) (just sayin')

Bee said...

I came running to tell you your girl Fregie is singing Live and Let Die!!!!! I think I know what the right choice would be!!!

Bee said...

I hope I'm not coming off as "stalky" cuz jean knee'll get mad at me!
This is torture!! She's rolling on the floor! Now she's flying!! Fergie not jean knee.

Bee said...

No! No! No! Not Queen Latifah!! She was cool once right?? They got her wearing somthing so not flattering!

BarnGoddess said...

friends with benefits???

Diesel said...

I've got 2 part time lovers who have worked out a nice jobshare arrangement.

Bee said...

Sunday click!
Although there was no sun out today.

Chris said...

Stevie Wonder is severely overrated. I shall henceforth call him Stevie Blunder.

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

Oh, no. Chris did NOT just say that.

Amber said...

This must be why Canada does not have any part-time lovers: we are bereft of illegal immigrants. And all those jobs no one else wants to do are forcing business to close down.

Little did I know just how far their responsibilities could extend.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

We are having some tremendously crappy Internet connection issues around La Casita De Infidel.

To my biggest fan up in Canada....NO I haven't run out of blog material. Thanks for caring. :)