Tuesday, January 17, 2006

No, Keanu, It's Not 'Whoa', It's WOE!

After yesterday's shameless display of the heathen side to my personality, I must counter it with a Church story. Unfortunately, its also irreverent. My fate will probably always rest in being referred to as "that weird convert chick".

My 10 year old daughter, Sunbum, was called to give her favorite scripture in Primary on Sunday. Well, Sunbum had a teacher last year that was unbelievably stern. Yep, he was a good candidate for stick removal surgery. Never a smile on the man. So, whenever one of his students exaggerated or embellished a story he would always say, "open your BOM to 2Nephi 9:34, and read it out loud". This made a big impression on young Sunbum and she decided to pay tribute to her former teacher and recite this scripture in front of the whole Primary.

It would have been funny, except our entire Stake Primary was visiting, and Emma Jo's, dad, our Stake President, was going to follow Sunbum and speak to the kids. I kept nervously thinking that surely she would change her selection given her audience. Come on, there are a LOT of good scriptures to choose from. But NO, she leaned into the microphone, and spoke loudly, "Woe unto the liar for he shall be THRUST down into Hell", with a lot of emphasis on the thrust and Hell part.

Some of said teacher's former students started to clap with enthusiasm. Mr. Stick himself had a big grin on his face that stayed with him throughout Primary. President Oscarson looked surprised and maintained a raised eyebrow look until his turn at the podium. Me? I couldn't stop laughing.

I may be on a course set for the Telestial Kingdom. *sigh*

P.S. For those of you that read my blog yesterday, see you there!!!

1 comment:

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I can just imagine what kind of impression my family made on Sunday.

I wonder how many of the Primary Presidency scribbled a note on their records stating that not only is the Mother weird, but apparently the gene was passed down to her spawn, and adding, in the future please assign scriptures, do not let those people choose.