Wednesday, May 24, 2006

90% BLOG FILLER WITH 10% UNRECOGNIZABLE MEAT BY-PRODUCT ADDED FOR FLAVOR

I've been working doggedly the past few days, and as a result it's made me a sporadic blogger. Before I leave to toil in the merciless hot sun again, I wanted to add something new. Please with hold any high expectations.

While sitting in Church during the last session of the April General Conference, they featured a speaker discussing his days as a young physician in New Zealand. My mind wanders frequently, and after a very intriguing story involving the guidance of a brain surgeon in Christchurch and his role in saving the life of a little boy, I started thinking about this........

What if you lived in Christchurch, New Zealand?

1. Would you feel pious and holier than thou and emphasize your location when talking to people? "Well, you know darling that I'm right, because after all, I live in Christchurch, and I'm divinely inspired."

2. A local bulletin board might read as follows:

An annual meeting of New Zealand ATHEISTS in CHRISTCHURCH.

Come join us at Hippy Hollow NUDIST COLONY located in CHRISTCHURCH.

We're welcoming all LUCIFERIANS to CHRISTCHURCH for our International Convention.

3. I bet crime and health statistics are fun to read:

DRUG USE runs rampant in CHRISTCHURCH.

Corruption and crime reaches epic proportions in CHRISTCHURCH.

STD's and out of wedlock pregnancy on the increase in CHRISTCHURCH.

4. Do things get hopelessly redundant there?

Welcome to the Church of Christ of Christchurch.

Maybe, it's just me, but I found these thoughts amusing. That is until my husband elbowed me and I snapped back to attention to listen to the rest of the Conference.

8 comments:

Pisces Iscariot said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Elizabeth-W said...

Good to know devout people have wandering minds during sessions. It's so hard to pay attention sometimes....

Mimo said...

Yes, especially when the couch for some reason feels especially comfy that day. I even fell asleep once on the hard ground. My son thought he caught me dozing, but I was able to save it with a nice little sniffle, and said my nose was just a little stuffy. ;)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Well, I leave to go attend a super secret blogger convention and return to find Pisces unique New Zealand commment missing. What was it about New Zealanders only looking for the financial gain side of everything? So they're capitalists? HOORAH! Add New Zealand to the list of potential places to move to when my Papi finishes University.

I fidget and squirm and make faces and cross my arms so I can poke my kids in an incognito fashion. I scarf snack Goldfish brought to occupy my toddlers, and sometimes color with them, all the while Papi is teling us to be reverent and for me to be a good example while at Church. Papi is the one who falls asleep though.

Lianne said...

So, I'm not the only one who has wondered about that. I think we should build a temple there: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Christchurch Temple.

heheheh

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Well lianne I've also thought about what it must be like to live in Corpus Christi and speak Spanish. Aye Carumba, there's some NASTY possibilities there.

Although how fun would that be to tell people in Spanish, "I'm an atheist and I don't believe in Christ, but I DO live in Corpus Christi"? I'm imagining drop jawed reactions and expressions of, HUH?

Moi said...

Maybe Pisces had a bunch of New Zealanders on his back, that's why he erased his comment, eh? I must have details about the secret meeting! We need pictures, and gossip now! Enquiring minds want to know- is Patrick really as dark and brooding as he seems? :o

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Patrick is the portrait of manliness:) He used LOL out loud frequently though. You've set a BAD example for him, carrot.

His wife is extremely nice and we found a lot of common ground, shared interests, we're the same age, and people we both know. Surprisingly enough they home birthed their youngest son with the same midwife that we use.

Miss Biotech Goddess also made a grand appearance thus solidifying the event as the "Shizknittiest Blogger Event" of the year.