Thursday, May 18, 2006
Phoning It In
Radioactive Jam's post the other day about inconsiderate cell phone owners reminded me of a little trick I played on my Papi a few years ago.
If we all had the opportunity to select a theme song to our lives, mine would be "Sour Girl", by The Stone Temple Pilots, and Papi is perfectly matched to Adam Ant's, "Goody Two Shoes". Yes, he don't drink, don't smoke, and never has. My kids and I like to play our music at deafening decibels. To which Papi vociferously objects and tells us, "This is a home, NOT a freakin Cantina. TURN IT DOWN". Papi's musical tastes runs the gamut from classical to big band to smooth jazz. Uh huh, all the same old man choices that my Grandpa picks out on his preset radio dials. When they had a Secret Santa gift exchange at his office a few years ago, Papi requested one of those "Sounds Of Nature" CD's. Do you personally know anybody that listens to those??!!?? The musical divide between us grows wider every year as Papi delights in telling me how uncultured I am because of my proclivity for techno and pop sounds. That made my revenge even sweeter.
Papi works in a nice office environment with predominately all women. Of course his cell phone was programmed to ring with some monotonous sonata that induces narcolepsy within the first few notes. I changed all that by downloading Snoop Dogg's classic, "Gin And Juice". The phone rang during a conference meeting thus allowing everyone in the room to hear the poetic stylings of Snoop. "Rolling down the street smoking indo, sipping on gin and juice. Laid back. With my mind on my money and my money on my mind". For a brief moment in time my conservative Papi was rollin wit da Dogg Pound! I struck again last year replacing the standard Nokia tone with the peppier "Get Right" by Jennifer Lopez. Between work and school he didn't have time to change it for several months, much to our delight. The kids and I danced with unbridled joy and laughed every time his phone started ringing. Papi shook his head, rolled his eyes, sighed, and complained a lot about it, but still didn't seem to have any sense of urgency to replace the tune for a long stretch of time. Me thinketh he doth protesteth too much and that he got a secret thrill from it too. Does that make him a phone-y?