Friday, September 08, 2006

The World May Not Be Ready For This!

OK GO- A Million Ways

I've been shirking some of my blogging duties lately, but it's all for a good cause.

There's a homeschool talent show looming on the horizon in approximately one month. I'm doggedly preparing my kids for it because I want to bedazzle the homeschooling masses with our bombastic style.

There are those among our homeschool elite who have shown off Ancient Egyptian projects complete with a mummified chicken they made. We also have one "so talented it hurts" family that can play Rachmaninoff on the bagpipes, and they raise exotic animals on their farm. Then there's the usual assortment of kids that can juggle, karate kick, play the Harry Potter theme on the piano, and sing. So, where does that leave my merry band of goofball homeschooled kids in this competition?


Our one and only true talent lies in bizarro dancing. My Sunbum broke it down Macarena style to a mariachi accompaniment in the middle of a Mexican restaurant. She earned a smattering of applause among the gaping mouths and raised eyebrows. Point is, we show no fear in looking ridiculous while shaking our groove thangs in public.

I've loved this song by OK GO, for some time now, and when I spied the goofy dance steps in this video, I just knew that we had to emulate it for the Talent Show. I mean, anything that has the Sprinkler move alongside The Charlies Angels, has to be good, right? So, the intense training continues on. I've started noticing an itching desire to wear black turtlenecks with a black sweater tied around my shoulders. I've also started speaking with a lisp and I snap my fingers limp-wristedly while simultaneouly screaming, "Okay people, take it from the top one more time. 2......3........4! Let me see more spirit fingers!" I'm furtively fighting the inclination to chain smoke and wear lycra pants too. Is this cause for concern?

14 comments:

Millie said...

It's amazing how well chain-smoking and Lycra pants go together.

If you can get your kids to dance like that, all the other families will go home hanging their heads in shame.

? said...

elastic, I ain't going home hanging my head in shame

you are so very funnnnnnnny ...I can imagine your sweet M&M's doing that dance...

Abby said...

LOL--I never figured you for a back stage mother! Are these the same guys that did a video a lot like this one...just on four tread-mills. Very cool. Let us know the outcome. If this one doesn't work, they can always use the groovy moves from Napoleon Dynamite! (I would give anything to have those mad dance skills--genius!)

Elizabeth-W said...

I've always held a secret fantasy to get myself and girls to do a dance at a ward talent night to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by the ever-delightful cindy lauper...which shows just how incredibly uncreative I am....

jams o donnell said...

LOL an amusing vid ewbl! Why does it remind me of Friday night discos at the Catholic boys school I went to????

omar said...

Yes. Yes it is.

Mimo- JenK said...

Napoleon Dynamite doesn't have anything on these guys! I mean, there's 4 of them, AND they have kung foo fighting dance moves!

You will be taping your children for our viewing entertainment, no?

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Okay. so the story is that the OK GO guys did not use a film crew at all for their video. Instead, they shot it with their own camera, in their backyard, and it was choreographed by one of their sisters.

millie, I think we're going to have to cut it down to an abbreviated version. All 3 1/2 minutes is proving difficult.

monkey, I'm training them like Siegfried and Roy train their tigers. With whips and prods. They're surprisingly fast learners.

abby- You don't know me so well then. I'm gonna turn all WANDA HOLLOWAY if my kids don't walk away the talent show champions!

elizabeth-You should absolutely petition the ward activity person to make all your hopes, dreams, and wishes come true. Although, my girls prefer Weird Al's version, "Girls Just Wanna Have Lunch." There's audible belching in it. Delightful!

jams- PLease don't tell me about the Lovers Lane or Makeout Point that was popular during your school days too!

Omar, you're just jealous that you haven't caught dance fever like we have! Jealous!

mullet- These OK GO guys are the shiz, aren't they? Little mullet will do well to grow up and be able to shake it like them.

No mimo. Just plain NO! Some events were not meant to be commemorated.

jams o donnell said...

Fear not mullets, there was always the local convent school girls who used to attend in droves. Make out point ewbl? that and lover's lane was probably by the dumpster!

Suzie Petunia said...

I am in love with this group. Who are they?!

Anonymous said...

I just read Colours Insulting to Nature by Cintra Wilson about the life of Liza Normal. Her mom, Peppy Normal, was totally the lycra-wearing creature you just described. except worse. think : wig addiction and a love of bourbon. and also imagine this creepy creature as Sister Maria from Sound of Music...juggling crucifixes in between yodels.

hilarious book. ugly fate. be forewarned!

Chris said...

Lycra pants...hmm...pictures EWBL in..Leapord skin*! Hot damn baby! (Can I say baby?)

* = Synthetic of course.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Hey syar! Cintra Wilson was the last serious girlfriend of a musician we really liked, Kevin Gilbert, before he died. She has some really weird stuff out there.

Suzie, OK GO is from Chicago, and they remind me of a more jangly, fun version of the 60's British rock invasion.

jams, I was subtly referring to your suggestion that Catholic boys danced together, meaning that I'd hate to see the Lovers Lane after a Catholic boys school dance.

christo, Fat women and leopard print Lycra do not and should not mix. It's one of the signs of the apocalypse. I know my fashion limitations!

Anonymous said...

have you see their new video? with the treadmills? choreographing geniuses they are.

-Syar