Thursday, November 16, 2006

Why I Married My Papi

The myriad of reasons would exceed the allotted blogger memory space, but I can narrow it down to a few. Papi works relentlessly to build a better future for all of us. Juggling work, school, Church calling, Daddy duties, and ahem, "husbandly" interactions. The man is a machine. Do you think he maintains a sour disposition about his less than easy life? Never. Through it all, he keeps a smile on his face.

Yesterday, he dropped his cell phone into the pool.......again. Just six weeks ago, we had to shell out for a replacement phone when he dropped his into our neighborhood pool. This time the YMCA pool claimed Papi's sole means of communicating with us, his precious family. To say that I felt irritated is a mild understatement. I mean, we have Christmas coming up, my electrolysis savings fund, new monkey socks for the ongoing competition with Radioactive Jam, our Pancho's Mexican Buffet budget. You know, important stuff. The last thing we need is another cell phone expense.

I got all riled up, and ready to let loose a torrent of anger towards Papi, when he looked over at me, broadly smiled, and started shaking his booty, and sashaying all around the living room, singing in his sexy Spanish accent, "Ooops I did it again, I dropped my cell phone, my wife is so pissed. Oh baby, baby."

Sadly, Britney Spears own marriage didn't work out, but her crappy music continues to bring harmonious joy into marital relationships the world over. Oh, the many times I've yelled out, "Hit Me Baby One More Time!" Perhaps, that's a story for another day


jams o donnell said...

Music has charms to soothes a savage breast as ever, even Britney's! I am not sure how many marital conflict points have been defused by Hawkwind or Robyn,, hmmm!

omar said...

Soothe a savage breast?

Between me and my boy, there's always a song going on in my house. Most have made-up lyrics, like the current fave, "Macaroni" (sung to the tune of Billy Idol's "Mony Mony"). said...

sadly Simon doesn't sing very often, only when he is drunk and then he just won't stop. My family sings all the time - our life is just one big musical. We are a lot like Omar though, we just make up songs, either to the tune of another real song or to some random tune. Sadly, none of us has any talent in this area - I guess that is why Simon has no appreciation for it.

No Cool Story said...

We Mexis have a knack for funniness, and no, you can’t resist us, it's futile ¿sabes?

Cheers to Papi, truly, Un Orgullo Mexicano.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

jams-I hate to correct you, but you're wrong, jams. 9 out of 10 quack psychologists recommend Britney music to soothe your average savage breast.

omar- We do that too! Of course, only because we're trying to be like you guys, omar.

on the run- Ooooh, your life is like a big musical. So, you got the singing part down, but tell me, do you guys break into choreographed dance too?

NCS- You and Papi truly are the pride of Mexico. Spreading Goodwill and Cheer to all you meet. Although most people don't care for thrift store stuff and laundry detergent to be spread around!
I like your new pilgrim hat. Superhappy girl better watch her back, or I'm going to steal it for my very own self.

Angela said...

OH MY GOSH! All I can ever think to write after some of your posts is, DANG YOU'RE FUNNY. And I must.write. The image of your Papi shaking his bootie singing Britney, is just hilarious. And then your own Britney song of choice. Dang, I gotta make my husband read this...

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Thank you angela! We here at the house of the smiling infidel aim to please. Sadly, it's just "one size fits most", instead of "one size fits all." My demographics show that people in outer Mongolia, and Pogo Pogo still don't get my humor though, and they gave a big thumbs down on the smiley face motif. :( Oh well.

HEY ON THE RUN! Maybe Simon holds back on singing until Garfunkel agrees to join in.