Monday, April 02, 2007

Welcome To Infidel Feel Good Day 2007!

I'm proclaiming this lovely Monday, dawn of a fresh new week, as 'Infidel Feel Good Day 2007!' I've noticed some fellow bloggers down in the mouth lately. Well, as annoyingly catchy church songs 101 taught us, "No one likes a frowny face. Change it for a smile!"

Local Houston blogger, On The Run, studied her tushy off for an important test and still found herself cheated out of a well deserved 'A.' Italian eatery franchise, Carrabba's, understands and wants to make things all better by cooking up a meal especially for her, and delivering it right to her car. By the way, I've seen this chick in her workout gear at the YMCA. On The Run must have her own carb eating stunt double because she definitely doesn't look like she's partaking of the pasta and breadsticks diet.

For dearest, funniest, goofiest, shizziest, Millie, because sometimes being 'flaky' is a good thing. In my world, it ranks as one of the highest compliments one can receive. Think about it, snowflakes are both flaky and one-of-a-kind originals. Right? Flaky also equates to rich, wholesome goodness that serves as a treat for all those around them. Now, if someone called you 'dry and crusty,' that's a whole nother matter.

Heavily pregnant blogger, Carrot Jello, has felt the searing pain that only buyer's remorse can inflict. See, she purchased her some new pajamas online in anticipation of baby carrot's May arrival, only to discover, to her sheer horror, that they had a juvenile print stamped all over them. Juvenile, as in juvenile delinquency. Well, the pajamas pictured above are mine. They're wrinkled up like an elephant's butt after many months of non-usage. The floral print makes me feel like Laura Ashley's fat twin that the family feels deeply ashamed of and keeps hidden from the public eye. When I wear the pant and top combo it's like 1956 all over again. I tell my Papi that we must invest in twin beds because sleeping in the same one is just so dirty and shameful. Always think, WWMTMD? What Would Mary Tyler Moore Do?



And finally, for elizabeth w., our very own blogger psychotherapist version of 'Analyze This!', I offer the Infidel family's deepest condolences on the passing of her beloved grandmother.

Naturally, the upbeat ditty 'Feel Good Inc.' by Gorillaz, is the official song of 'Infidel Feel Good Day 2007.'

19 comments:

Linda said...

Hi, Elastic Infidel! (or something like that.) I posted this comment in response to yours on my blog, but you may never return there, so I came by to drop it here. Nice to meet you formally. You can think of me as "Vel Crow," which would be really funny if I could share my full name. Trust me; it's funny. Glenn Beck rocks because he told the truth about Terri Schiavo, and he has been my hero ever since. I know Elkhart. Used to know some people who moved there from here. Have you heard Muncie's motto? It's "Muncie--we're trying!" That says it all. Thanks for stopping by! And that thing about being Laura Ashley's twin is hilarious.

Kimberly said...

Thanks muchly for the cheerin' up! Just...thanks, you know?

on.the.run said...

I am so excited to get a mention on your award winning blog. The good news (apart from the mention) is that my grade turned out to be 75/75 and not 75/100 so I am happy again. I love Carrabas btw, I try to stick to whole wheat pasta these days so I can save my unhealthy intake for chocolate.

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

I'm sorry - did you just call me the "shizziest"? Is that good?

Thank you for mentioning me and for cheering me up in my time of need. You're right - flaky should NOT be a negative label. I will embrace my rich, flaky goodness (and lack of dry crustiness because that's just gross).

I should post a pic of my ugly jammies too. My u-jammies.

jams o donnell said...

what an excellent idea

Carrotjello said...

You are too nice. Your pajamas are still not as ugly as mine, but you are still too nice for words. Thank you.

Toni said...

I love being 'flaky'!

scribbit said...

Yes, that would be the song the day requires.

compulsive writer said...

Ditto Scribbit! That is one great party happy song!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

linda- Ooooh...........Muncie! I heard that Eric Estrada was hanging out in your hood for a reality TV show recently. That should definitely put Muncie on the map.

kimberly- I would have added you to my 'Feel Good' list had I know you had the Monday blahs. I'm no doctor, but I play one on this blog occasionally. I'm prescribing you a heavy dose of The Rapture to break you out of your funk. Hope you have some roller skates handy, you'll need them. Oh, and don't ever challenge a Matthew Broderick looking sax player to a skate-off, because you'll lose, sucka!

on the run- Well, I eat when I'm happy and sad. So, Carrabba's may be sending you subliminal messages to come in for a celebration dinner! By the way, I saw that sign and got all excited. My Sunbum actually got out of the truck to walk around the building and snap that picture just for you. See my dedication?

millie- I bought a green set at Wal-Mart at Christmas. I look like the leprechaun that ate Chicago in them. Wanna know my dirty little secret? I'm flaky too.

jams- It's all fun and games around here. I won't rest until every blogger has a smile on their face, a song in their heart, and a fart joke to share.

carrot- I'm donating mine to those Australian 'Bananas In Pajamas' guys. I figure the floral print would be a nice change away from their stripey jammies.

toni- That's right, Sister Toni.....embrace your inner flakiness......love your inner flakiness.....use the power of the flakiness to tell others to 'flake off.'

scribbit- I'm a music nerd. Want to know the truth? My first choice was Chuck Mangione's instrumental classic, "Feels So Good." Yeah, because mellow 70's hits by the original artists is how I roll, dawg! Sadly, best audio codes did not offer the great and wonderful Chuck Mangione for our listening pleasures. :(

compulsive- My 5 year old rocks out to this song.

Burg said...

Underneath all that snark and lawn fertilizing is a nice person..

I can't say I'm surprised..

Jennifer B. said...

Awww. Miss EWL you are too much.

wendela said...

When I saw "ON THE RUN" on the marquee, I thought as in from the law.
Nice bloggidy care and good stuff there, elastic. You cheered up a whole lotta fellow bloggers. :)
Hey, on the Fine Living network, Houston was on the top 10 of best places to live in the U.S.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Burg- I'm multi-layered.....like an onion. With each layer being stinkier than the one before.

jennifer- That's what my doctor said when I stepped on the scale at my last appointment. :(

wendela-Yes, the chance of living in close proximity to the Smiling Infidel finally catapulted Houston into the top of the charts! Well, actually, as much as I'd like to take credit, it's probably related to our substantially lower cost of living expense here. Houston also holds the distinguished honor of being the only American city to have all 7 determining factors that terrorists look for when plotting attacks. Go us! We've also held the title of 'Fattest City,' and 'Most Polluted.' Woot for H-town!

Lyle said...

Hail the Infidel Feel Good Day 2007!

Suzanne said...

Thanks, Elastic. I think a "Feel Good Day" is just what I've needed. Sometimes we just need the weight of the world to be gone for a moment! :)

carronin said...

I can't believe I missed Feel Good Day. Now I'm bummed.

No Cool Story said...

I'm a few days late for the Infidel Good Day. It seems I am also the last one to comment.
Coincidence? Perhaps. Or Perhaps Carronin and I were supposed to be last, for some obscure bigger than we can comprehend reason.
Time will tell, Elastic, time.
See you on the Infidel Good Day 2008!

Elizabeth-W said...

Sorry, Coolio, I think I'm the last. Just saw the note. Thanks very much. You would've really liked Effie. She had a rapier wit, and didn't mind a good toot joke.