How often we've listened and gagged during the rather descriptive ads for colonic irrigation products that rid your body of impacted fecal matter. How often we've rolled our eyes and uttered a resounding "Riiiiggghhhhtttt," at the A.D. Kessler 'Creative Real Estate' promos, touting a dubious property buying scheme that will supposedly make you an overnight millionaire. How often we've marveled over the women unsure of who their baby daddy is when a local lab advertises special cut rate DNA testing services. As interesting as we both find impacted fecal matter infomercials, our favorite radio spots belong to the "Get Rich Quick While Working At Home" people.
Yesterday, one of their plethora of ads ran on XM Satellite Radio obtrusively interrupting our talk radio staple, Dr. Laura. It began in the usual way.
How would you like to work from home?
How would you like to be debt free?
How would you like to never have to worry about money again?
How would you like to be your own boss?
How would you like to lay around watching TV and licking a potato chip bag clean while still making an income?
Sounds like a dream come true, right? Well, then the announcer prattles on to say that you could work as much or as little as you want in your free time earning passive residual income. You only need to contact them and buy a starter kit to get yourself on the road to financial freedom. AHA, there's the catch. But then, Sunbum and I felt our cynical hearts soften when Mr. Announcer Guy continued his spiel with talk of enjoying a 'STICK FIGURE INCOME.' Whaaaattt??!!?? Sunbum and I gasped and looked wide-eyed at each other. We can make money with stick figures? Why didn't anyone tell us this before? What a long awaited revelation! We've lived our entire lives outside the gilded 'STICK FIGURE INCOME' walls, and now Mr. Announcer Guy has coyly offered us the chance to break in. I put my girls, Sunbum and Monkey to work as soon as we got home.
Sunbum has elected to balance her life out by only working part time with the lucrative 'STICK FIGURE INCOME' plan. They did specify that you could work as much or as little as you want, because it's so very versatile and flexible. The results of her stick figure slacking are visibly evident. She'll never make it to the Golden Stick Figure pyramid level at this rate.
Monkey, however, has given herself over completely to the 'STICK FIGURE INCOME' plan, dropping both her school studies and basketball practice to focus in on creating stick figure wealth. She doesn't need no exercise or education cause she's gonna be rich! As her mother, I'm very impressed with her dedication, and collection of vibrantly colored stick figures. I'm confident that Monkey's efforts will really open the door to a life of luxury and prestige.
So, TODAY ONLY, I'm offering all you bloggers this life changing program. You want in on the proven 'STICK FIGURE INCOME' plan? Please send $99.99 to The Smiling Infidel in Crackertopia, for your starter kit and folder of glowing 'STICK FIGURE INCOME' success stories and testimonials. Respond immediately and I'll also throw in a very special limited production of exclusive Smiling Infidel smiley face stickers to complement your STICK FIGURES!!!!!!
*Disclaimer: Results are not typical of actual 'STICK FIGURE INCOME' plan members. In fact, most of our program members can barely afford the bread to go with their monthly allotment of government cheese. You will have better odds of success investing in a cache of lottery tickets and mustache wax.*