Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Wordless Wednesday Edition: "Mathematics 101-When Buying Shorts, If The Width Is Greater Than The Length.....You Should NOT Wear Them!"

We even borrowed a ruler from the office supplies section to verify, that yes, indeed, the width of these lovely cotton knit shorts measured out far greater than the actual length.

Please stop this detrimental assult on the public's ocular health. Only you can prevent plus sized fashion tragedy.

54 comments:

jams o donnell said...

Hah beat me! But you must admit, they are capacious shorts!

Radioactive Jam said...

I don't disagree but this might drive the wrong behavior with the size-zero crowd. They'll just keep working on a still-smaller width.

Speaking of, did you see "today's" pictures of Cate "Skelly" Blanchette? Someone needs to have a talk with her.

Suzanne said...

Yay for modest mini Infidels! You're a great mom, Elastic! :)

jams o donnell said...

Neyr nyer, beat you on the list ewbl!!!

Amber said...

I dunno. I think cellulite would look particularly fetching in the white ones....

Toni said...

OMG! I no longer have a shorts 'season'. Just a capri season- if you are real lucky- I will shave to the knee! Oh-la-la.... The Hubs is one lucky man, is he not???

tegdirb92 said...

LOL--you have a point there :) Happy WW!

Alison said...

Oh dear! I'll have to remember this one ;-)

Marc said...

I wouldn't want to see anyone wearing those shorts!

Happy WW!

Stacie said...

I stick with capris. My knees must not be seen; that would be cruel to onlookers.

Lia said...

Is it Wednesday already? I wish!

I'm so with you on this, though. There's a level of familiarity that I don't need to have with the bodies of perfect strangers. Even of familiar people.

Autofocused said...

Never mind the quality, feel the width!

Skewedview said...

I'm going straight home to measure.
Eeks!

Kimberly said...

I'm so thinking about sending a copy of this post to my father-in-law. ~shudders~

Starrlight said...

ROLF!

letha said...

Big is fun ... You should see my ladies.

Annie said...

"Momma, why can't I get the leopard print hoochie shorts that show off my junk?"

maggie said...

WORDS TO LIVE BY

Rav`N said...

*lol* a worthy lesson

Sue said...

I've got that somg "Who Wears Shorts Shorts" stuck in my head now...shudders! Happy WW ... :)

Melanie said...

How funny! Pretty funny what people will wear!

Janie Hickok Siess, Esq. said...

And of course they have to be BRIGHT screamin' zonker yellow! Jeez.

Michael - Lover of Amy said...

I absolutely agree. Also, a ban on any shorts with words across the butt. Ask a father if he wants the attention of 40 year-old men drawn to his 12 year-old daughter's ass.

DebD said...

LOL - so true. If they they look good in them, I want to borrow their mirror sometime.

Happy WW

Deb on the Run

Katya said...

Too funny...racks of shorts will never be the same in my mind now!!!

PJ said...

...I thought those were head bands.

wynne said...

Some people should really consider growing out their shorts...yowzer.

Rhonda said...

Shorts are evil.

Unless you work at BJ Services. ha!

Pearls of Wisdom said...

Hehehe...." Unless you work at BJ services " LOL Thanks for the laugh and sharing. Happy WW my friend.

Hugs,

Angel ( Angel Mama Pearls of Wisdom)

An Ordinary Mom said...

Fashion faux pas for sure.

Burg said...

Oh yes.. They must go.

Biker Betty said...

ROTF, great observation!!! I hate short shorts for me. Happy Wednesday :)

compulsive writer said...

When having legs, ff the width is greater than the length, you should not wear them.

Jenn in Holland said...

Oh boy, my WW was almost something similar today but I will save the shot of the neighbors bloomers on the laundry line for another day!

Ingrid said...

ha ha!!! tell me about it!!! it's about ratio and proportion!!! great shot!!!

anyhowblogs said...

Thanks for the lesson. We learn something new everyday!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I took this picture at a little local store called Wal-Mart. Perhaps you've heard of it? The ladies section attendant was none too happy with the booty short photo shoot session and told me that she was going to call security if I didn't stop.

So, how you like them apples? Wal-Mart can propogate ideals of indecent exposure, but I'm the one in trouble? PSHAW!

I risked a scary interrogation from Wal-Mart security just to provide you fellow bloggers with the finest in booty short equations. My dedication is truly remarkable.

mar said...

long live my capris...
happy ww :)

The Wilson's said...

Anyone who has that big of waist should not be wearing those short of shorts!! And that is just my opinion :). Happy WW!!!

Linda said...

Oh I totally agree! Too funny!! Fashion designers should be shot sometimes!

Chris @ Real Horses said...

I had to clean my monitor after looking at your WW post. Coffee everywhere!

Happy WW!

PJ said...

I live a few miles south of the WM headquarters so I have to whisper this....

They think you are taking pictures of their "short, shorts display" to give to the enemies out there who may want to copy that vogue style, WM sets the style you know.

I had to say that last thing, living in (hem)..this State.

sara - The Estrogen Files said...

Well... What to say? Bad news there! Built to sit on fashionable hips, rather than mine!

http://smcarney.blogspot.com/2007/05/wordless-wednesday-oddness-in-world.html

Imma ( Alice) said...

That is excellent advice and I sure hope everyone follows it. Just the thought of seeing anyone in those shorts makes me sick... I think I'll go back to bed. Haha

Everyone is invited to my blog, hope to see you there. :o)

whenn said...

LOL! Hmm, I agree with you. Definitely!
Thanx for stopping by my WW! :)

jedimacfan said...

Wal*Mart "security"? STAY BACK or we shall be forced to do nothing but continue to shout at you!

carronin said...

Thanks for the fashion tip. Maria and I are going back the Walmart today to return our shorts;)

Qtpies7 said...

Seriously! I'm not plus sized, but I still don't go that high! LOL I'm not skinny, either, but not much above the knees is pretty to look at.

mcewen said...

I beg to differ - you are merely on the wrong continent - I believe they are European shorts.
Cheers

BarnGoddess said...

omg, how scary. My huge ass would be offensive in those things....

Thoroughly Modest Millie said...

People who buy those shorts need to read this before actually wearing them out in public. YAGGGHHH!!

b. said...

Just daaaaang funny! You made the day of an entire floor of tired pediatric nurses and staff!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

The sins against humanity are great millie and b.

PJ- I'm glad that my super secret booty short undercover ops position wasn't compromised by the pissy attendant. I'm on a mission to save us all from having to endure looking at people who don't have a clue how to buy clothes in their correct size.

on.the.run said...

I like to call those underwear. I don't think they should sell shorts that short in any size... and I think it should be illegal to sell cloths that are totally unflattering for the person who buys them... like there should not be pin-stripe pants in a 0, somethings are just wrong.