Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Have You Ever Noticed That Butter Has The Word BUTT In It?

I'll admit it.......I'm a hater. An acronym hater, that is. Don't worry, my hate doesn't include worthwhile organizations like the (HarperValley)PTA, PTO, DARE, LDS, DEA, CIA, CSI, and the IRS. Wait a minute, I guess I do hate the acronym IRS and all that it stands for. No, rather, I'm referring to Net Speak and the sinister acronym abuse that's creeping into our English vernacular and all forms of computer correspondence. I know a lady who peppers each and every one of her homeschool group and personal e-mails with an abundance of random and irrelevant 'LOL's!!!!' as far as the eye can see. Example: "So which curriculum is everybody using this year for their DD and DS?LOL!!!!" What does that say about us homeschoolers to any and all who would read such drivel? I'll tell you what it says, that homeschooling moms remain ensconced at a mentality level that would rival a giggling teenager. Furthermore, if people really LOL'ed and ROFL'ed as much as they claim, they'd need some serious psychiatric intervention. No offense to the very funny bloggers around here, but you've never actually made me Roll On The Floor Laughing. The scriptures tell us 'everything in moderation,' and that should definitely extend to frivolous acronym usage as well. I've always wondered how this acronym craziness on the computer came about, and then I saw my receipt from Kroger's yesterday and I was like, WTH? Look closely, it reveals conclusively that you can catch the LOL syndrome from LOL butter. My mom must have vaccinated me in my youth against the detrimental effects of LOL butter, because so many good people I know seem to suffer from it while I remain immune.
Just a warning that you need to avoid this butter at all costs if you desire to follow down a rosy, acronym-free path for the rest of your life. The fat free version probably rings up as LMAO since you can Laugh Out Loud all day while floating high on LOL butter, but if you're serious about reducing the size of your butt, you need to eat the fat free LMAO or Laughing My Arse Off butter substitute.

31 comments:

Annie said...

I admit to never having really ROFL!

But I have L.U.I.W.M.A.L!

Lauged until I wet myself a little.

mcewen said...

I only learned what those acronyms meant a short while ago and I always have to think twice to recall what they mean.
Tiny brained person

Carrotjello said...

LOL! Great post! Keep them coming!

aubrey said...

yeah, i'll admit...i've never LOL. the extent of my LOL is a guffaw. maybe two or three giggles in succession. but that's about it. i mean, you're staring at a computer, while life goes on around you. things are funny, but they're not THAT funny. am i wrong?

Tori :) said...

OMG INBD.
(It's no big deal.)
Do you mean I can't use LOL now? TISNF!! (That is so not fair!!)
I love that commercial. (IDK, my BFF Jill?)

Toni said...

LOL!



You knew it was coming!

Radioactive Jam said...

I always knew there was something funny about that butter.

carronin said...

WTHHTGT!
(What the heck happened to Gay Tuesday) LOL!

Kimberly said...

My dislike of acronyms is almost as intense as my dislike of word verifications. Curse you "luwfpovc"!

Amber said...

Offense taken. I guess I'll try harder to actually get you down on the floor laughing. And I expect photographic evidence.

jams o donnell said...

Ach I find myself using LOL and a few other acronyms too and remember that hearse has arse in it! On a related matter Steve Bates was saying not long ago that he had to use the sxpression Cardiovascular Risk Assessment Program on a webiste some time ago... now that cries out for an acronym!

Sketchy said...

Yeah, no floor rolling here, best acronym I've seen though was LSHMBAB (Laughing so hard my boobs are bouncing) Now that one is a touch more realistic and perhaps slightly too much information...

Melissa said...

Okay, so I am one of the "lol" offenders... I use it often. Please don't make me share a jail cell with Paris Hilton... but really, and maybe it's because my brain is all warped and twisted, but I have laughed out loud whilst reading your blog... on several occassions :)

Lia said...

I use LOL as a word, to mean something on the internet that makes me laugh. I have indeed laughed out loud - at work, no less.

While it is kind of sad the way we destroy the English language, the other way of looking at it language evolution and the rise of dialects, which I don't think linguists have a real problem with.

It's kind of ironic that I came here straight from a half hour over at urbandictionary.

Melissa said...

BTW (heehee) the little scream thing at the beginning of your latest song... it scared the CRAP outta me! Thanks for that

Annie said...

Carronin is right! Where the heck are the gays?!

PJ said...

The next time I LOL, I think I'll drop and ROFL just to keep it real.

I bought the Storm "butt paste" today. I skipped over all the other rash creams just for the joy of buying a box labeled "butt paste" LOL...great here I go...

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Me have to go to work. :( I may have to start a new tradition of Gay Tuesday Wednesdays! LOL!

Look, all the LOL ROFL LMAO activity doesn't really bother me that much.........in moderation.

No Cool Story said...

I did This. For reals.

Last night I asked DH for a bite of his PB sandwich. He looked too pleased to share with me...it was too late for me to find out his sandwich had PB AND butter (thus ruining a perfectly good sandwich).
I did not LOL at that. Butter and peanut butter should never be together.

PS: I can't wait for Gay Tuesday on Wednesdays!!

aubrey said...

so, i am chatting over here with my husband and he said something funny and i typed LOL. argggggh.

i think now instead of LOL i'm just going to put a smiley face. yet that seems too mild, when i'm really smiling BIG and think what was written is funny. not funny enought to actually LOL and definitely not funny enough to ROFL, but still funnier than a boring old smiley face. this is now a dilemma. i'll have to get back with you on this.

No Cool Story said...

Butter Lamb. Just because.

Amanda said...

I used to use DH all the time, but I don't like it now. It seems too impersonal to write that about my husband. I once saw HF on a lds message board for an abbreviation for Heavenly Father. That really bugged me! I admit to using LOL and ROFL occasionally, but never L.U.I.W.M.A.L. Is there a support group for this sort of thing?

Syar said...

I read in a magazine somewhere that "Roffle" was now a new word to the slang lexicon. It's basically a phonetic pronounciation of ROFL. I mean, really? It sounds like you're saying waffle or woofing like a yappy dog.

Also, butter. Izzie on Grey's Anatomy ate a whole tub while depressed. I can't believe that. How do you eat a whole tub of butter? I am looking to you for sage wisdom on this matter, o' Elastic.

Radioactive Jam said...

Great joy for you: a lovely meme tag.

No need to thank me, and - take your time. No hurry, no worries!

omar said...

I think the LOL is acceptable IF it's true. As there's no way to verify it in the context it's generally used, I guess I have to give people the benefit of the doubt. Personally, I am a silent laugher, so even when I do laugh, it's not really "out loud." So you'll never see it from me. I'm trustworthy like that.

However, the DS and DD and DH kind of drive me nuts (the wife is guilty of letting those slip into everyday conversation on occasion). NUTS.

BarnGoddess said...

I am guilty of WTF...

I never really knew what ROFL meant, thnx for defining it for me!

Elizabeth-W said...

If it's funny enough for me to tell someone else, I'd say that warrants a rofl. If it makes me make a body sound, such as aubrey's guffaw, that warrants a lol. That's sort of how I break it down. You've gotta have standards. I love unsalted butter, just so you know.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I'm still working.........waaaahhhhhh. I just came home for a potty break. Don't despair y'alls, I'll be back later to leave you some purdy, shiny comments and introduce the first ever Gay Tuesday Wednesday! I see the LOL vs.non-LOL debate is continuing here. For the record, I occasionally use the LOL acronyms too, but only under the context of high amusement. I get irritated when people use the power of the LOL for non-LOL things. For instance, "I went to the store because I was out of toilet paper. LOL! And then they had this humongous sale on moist butt wipies so I decided to try them instead. LOL!" No, it's just not LOL worthy.

PJ- The Houston Chronicle ran a story about the Butt Paste inventor a few years ago. I don't remember all the details but as I recall he's a Louisiana dad(a pediatrician too?) frustrated with ineffective diaper rash cream and he set about to make his own. I think he came up with the name because it is essentially, BUTT PASTE, and he knew it would garner attention on a crowded baby needs shelf. Ingenious. That's the only brand I bought during the Infidel diapering years.

If Amber, Jeannie, NCS, and Isaura are reading, a superdy duperdy good Good Mail Girl Edition is set to drop as soon as I have a non-working moment.

omar- The afore referenced LOL crazy lady drops LOL into everyday conversations too. *le sigh* She also laughs at all my lame jokes which should boost my confidence, but it just feels hollow. No, I need sincere LOL's to continue functioning.

Chris said...

Whenever I chat with my friends I normally use Hahaha when something slightly funny occurs. LOL, for me, means it's not that funny but because I'm such a nice guy, I'm willing to LOL when, in fact, it's nothing to LOL to.

Annie said...

(Sitting here waiting for a new post. Pass the Junior Mints and popcorn.)

Jennifer B. said...

I have GOT to get me some of that LMAO butter substitute! Wahoo--by the end of summer I'm going to be down two dress sizes.