Friday, June 22, 2007

The Manor Estate Known As 'Mellow Yellow'

Out of all the strikingly gorgeous color combinations in this world, why, oh why, would anyone choose to throw brown and yellow together? WHY?!!!??? The mini-infidels and I don't actually call this home, 'Mellow Yellow Manor,' because Donovan probably still has some sort of copyright law attached to his 60's classic. However, we do refer to it as 'The PooPee House.' See what I did there? I made my very own compound word! Poo aptly describes the skid mark brown trim circling around the eaves and splashed across the garage doors. I'm ever so glad they didn't go with a chunky texture paint. Yes, that definitely would have increased the 'EWWWWWW' factor to the infinite 'EWWWWW' power. The Pee part adequately covers the yellowish hue selected to adorn the rest of the homes exterior.

I sincerely hope that the house never falls under a demolition order because I can just imagine the confusion it could potentially cause among the workers. They'd argue bitterly, one saying "We can't tear it down. The house is yellow. Everyone knows if it's yellow, let it mellow." While some of the other guys will chime in with a vociferous, "Oh yeah? But it's also brown. Remember, if it's brown, flush it down!" I fear that it'll launch a spirited battle not seen since the stadium Tastes Great-Less Filling days. Things could get very ugly.

Do you really want to instigate another Civil War, people? Then you must choose your house colors wisely. The power rests in your capable paintbrushing hands.

25 comments:

Sketchy said...

POO-Pee house, lol. The world has changed for me since I met you Elastic. I gotta tell you.

aubrey said...

yeah, let it mellow! that's what i'm all about! those poor demolition guys. there will seriously be mass confusion. there's a house up the street that was just painted a hideous color of muddy orange. WHAT is the point? i really don't understand the ugly colors people paint their houses with.

Dan the Echo Boomer said...

I read a post talking about being environmentally friendly where someone commented we should "be like the truckers and pee in a cup then pour it out later." Someone else then replied we should 'be like the truckers and pee in a cup then throw it out the window into her freshly clothesline-dried laundry"

Then I read this and because both posts had used the "if it's yellow, let it mellow" couplet, I connected them. Thanks again for the "extra newspaper sections"

And, I'm short-selling my stock in emo, and the verification "dcrncfgt" which seems a little close to "D.C. Republican National Committee Faggot" and is quite frankly, unacceptable.

Tori :) said...

The PooPee house. That's rad. LOL- for real. I really did LOL.

No Cool Story said...

Oh Elastic, how I love thee.
"The Brown Wave", oh my gosh.

Amanda said...

PooPee house! That is great! I feel your pain though. We've always affectionately referred to our house as the pea green house. It is similar to yours except trade the yellow for pea green. We've talked about painting it since we bought it, but still haven't. Someday....

Chris said...

Actually, I kinda like. In a "poo-pee" kinda way. Tee hee!!

Anna Maria Junus said...

Sigh, I'll never look at a brown and yellow house the same way again.

jams o donnell said...

Ach I look out the window and I see two pee houses on the other side of the road. Lots of brown too but that is bare brick - There's a lot of it about!

but yellow and brown together.. I will never look at that combination the same way again!

Emily said...

Thank you for a good chuckle.

Elizabeth-W said...

Has your humor always been bodily function-related, or just since having the mini's? Your youngest close to done with the anal phase, so I'm just mourning the loss if you feel compelled to give it up to more sophisticated humor :)

Lauren said...

Unfortunately, we have some neighbors with the same color combination. The sad part is that they had a lovely blue house before and CHOSE to paint their house those colors....foolish haha.

You are so cool for making a compound word!!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

sketchy-Forget about Elmo's World, this is Elastic's World you livin in, baby!

aubrey- Can we blame it on color blindness? Finally the politically correct people have had their way and we no longer 'see color.'

dan- Hee-Hee, you said 'couplet.'

tori- Don't mess with me cuz I'm the Master Of The Compound Word, yo!

NCS- You don't really want somebody to give you a brown wave, NCS. It could be that they just got done snarfing down a bag of melted chocolate chips, but it also could be something much more insidious. Why take chances?

Amanda: Lives in a house custom painted by the vomiting little girl from The Exorcist. Nothing says happy house possession quite like pea green!

christo- Oh, you younguns and your rabble rousing ways. Your assignment is to write ten sentences using your new compound word of the week, PooPee.

anna maria-Clearly, my work here is done then.

jams- My personal favorite color combo for a house is a grayish-blue with a dark teal trim. It's very 'NOW,' and beats a nasty yellow/brown combination with a stick. A paint stir stick, that is!

emily- I'm not here to provide you with chuckles, missy. I'm here to stop you from painting your house wretched color combos. Come back and take the House Painting Oath stipulating a decent color code of conduct.

elizabeth- I used to joke exclusively about tea and crumpets and high drama down at the Country Club during Polo season, but then Muffy had me blackballed from her cotillion for saying that she looked like a drag queen in her Escada gown. Ever since that day, I've re-directed my comedic efforts towards a low brow demographic.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

lauren- Like my compound words? Then you'll LOVE my double negatives. Ain't no lying there!

Elizabeth-W said...

Maybe sophisticated was the wrong word. I'm just glad you won't be giving it up any time soon. Although, I think anything you'd choose would be hilarious. Esp. country club comedy. I've never been to country club so I probably wouldn't get the jokes, though (which is why I'm glad you're sticking to your current genre).

Toni said...

Wow~ never really thought about it- guess I will go with brick... one day....

Burg said...

It kind of reminds me of cake.

wendela said...

Yeah,I was also thinking cake. I was thinking yellow cake with chocolate frosting. Even houses look delicious when I'm on a diet. Sad, really sad. I like your frou frou/imogen music. Nothing reminds me of food in it, which is good. :)

BarnGoddess said...

omg! maybe the owners/residents are color blind....gawd I hope so.

those colors remind me of a suit my father owned in 1972, ack!

in my area we have a big beautiful victorian house except its painted electric blue with purple trim, WTF!?! they ruined a perfect house....

Melody said...

Leave it to Elastic to create a new word. Never again will "poopy" have the same meaning for me. From now on it's going to be "PooPee."

Great music vid too.

Melody said...

Pee. Ess.

Speaking as a nures, I must add that the particular color of pee on your neighbors house indicates a fairly healthy urinary tract. It's nice and dilute, so there appears to be adequate fluid intake -- maybe a little cloudy or has some sediment, but that can be remedied.

The poo, however, doesn't look very good. The are definately not vegetarians. They could use some fiber or perhaps an enema.

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

carronin said...

I'm with Burg it reminds me of yellow cake with chocolate frosting yummy. Someone pass the milk.

Glo said...

Yellow and brown was a fashion craze a few years ago and I'm still on the fence for how I feel about it.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Toni- Not even brick is safe from me making jokes. Haven't you ever heard the expression, 'SH*T a brick?'

burg- Cake? Like the group? Only girls with a short skirt and a long jacket remind me of Cake.

wendela-Looooooonnnggg time, no see! Yeah, I'm not so crazy about Imogen's solo work, but I lurve Frou Frou.

barn goddess-My perfect imaginary house is a yellow or teal Victorian with brightly colored stained glass windows. I agree about brown suits being dated. Leave brown apparel to the UPS guys.

Melody- Me love Melody! Me love Melody! Look at you, using your nursing experience to enhance my blog and explain bodily function stuff in a totally clinical way. You know I'm all about the bodily function stuff. When I was pregnant, the midwives had me on a pre-natal vitamin called Vitamist. You spray it on the inside of your cheek like Binaca breath freshener. It's supposed to absorb directly into your body while regular horse pill prenatal vitamins mostly get flushed out of your system without proper absorption. They said that you can tell how much of the vitamin is benefitting your body by the color of your urine. I've never before or since examined my urine so closely. I could have joined the P.S.I squad. Pee Scene Investigator.

carronin- Your mind is so much more innocent and pure than mine! You and Burg must be channeling Betty Crocker.

glo- I like the new trend of light blue or pink mixed with brown. Yellow and brown? Not so much.

Burg said...

There's a group called cake?