Saturday, March 01, 2008

We Got Flashed By An Inanimate Streaker At Cici's Pizza!

The Infidel family made a rare public appearance yesterday as we dined out amidst the glitz and glamour of the vinyl booths and serving line heating lamps at Cici's Pizza Buffet. Yes, so there we were eating away again in Diarrheaville, searching for our lost shaker of cheese when Melody suddenly screamed out in a horrified voice "That napkin holder is NAKED!!!!"
We've taught our mini-infidels the moral value of embracing the ideals of modesty and now we're finally seeing the blossoming fruits of our parental diligence. Young Melody wants everyone and everything to be properly clothed......even the napkin dispenser.
When I flipped the dispenser over to reveal that it was stuffed full of napkins on the other side and therefore could only be half-naughty and possibly suffering a split personality disorder, Melody decided to give the wayward napkin holder an encouraging squeeze. I guess that makes Melody some sort of tree-hugger because napkins do come from trees, and she is trying to save them, right?

Moral Of Today's Blog Post: Love The Napkin Sinner, Not The Napkin Sin.

*I Made A Loincloth Out Of Napkins To Cover The Nakedness Of Humor-Blogs.Com*

29 comments:

Carrot Jello said...

FIRST!
twice in a row.

Carrot Jello said...

She's trying to save souls. Even napkin holders have souls. What a girl you have there.

glittersmama said...

mmmm...cici's. I want some. Why wasn't I invited?

Jean Knee said...

uhm, does yer dog hafta wear clothes? if not, he's nekkid.


I'm still waiting on your swim suit pic

the Bag Lady said...

At least you are teaching your children morals! Glad to see it...
So many children in the world today wouldn't have noticed nor cared that the napkind dispenser was naked!

on.the.run said...

You are brave. You sure do have a gift for writing - you should publish something.

Your littlest is so cute - how do you get anything done - I would want to hug her all the time.

Lisa said...

Ditto-OTR. Melody is just adorable!!

Bee said...

Here is the important question nobody has asked... did you find the shaking cheese!

It's Just me! said...

I'm just impressed that you take your kids out! Of course, they are cute enough (and probably nice enough) to be in public without complete embarrassement.

You've taught your tree hugger well!

jams o donnell said...

I'm glad to see Melody is concerned about the modesty of the napkin holder. Well done that girl!

Millie said...

Hey, OUR napkin holder last night was half-naked too!!!

I wonder if restaurants are trying to conserve "clothing." They'll stoop to anything to sell their lousy food these days.

Jean Knee said...

I poked you,


I hope it's not sexual

Tracy said...

My daughter thinks that Cici's is right next door to heaven.
Oh the horror of the naked napkin holder. Get her therapy now for what her eyes were forced to see!

Amber said...

I see its future in a topless bar....

BarnGoddess said...

oh my, she is cute!! she made me smile :)

I want some pizza now........

Nancy Face said...

A pizza buffet sounds yummy, even in Diarrheaville!

Nancy Face said...

I'd be a lot more worried about a naked toilet paper holder than a naked napkin holder...did you happen to check out the restroom in that fine establishment?

Nancy Face said...

Melody is SOOO CUTE! :)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

on the run- Here's the funny thing. I told Melody what you said and she replied, "Well, I want to hug her too!"

There you go. It's a Huggy Party and you're invited!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Have you ever felt like a post was really funny and you sit around waiting for more people to comment and then they don't and then you feel disappointed? This was one of those. I thought it was funny and I laughed the whole time I wrote it but it hasn't yielded much response. Maybe I'm just weird and my sense of humor is off the normal mainstream level.

Thanks for the comments! There will be a higher reward for your kindness and taking pity on me.

No Cool Story said...

There will be a higher reward for your kindness and taking pity on me.

Oh, you quit that right now, you hear?!?

This was a cute post (cute girl pictures), good story and GOOD moral to the story.
I can see you using this for A RS lesson. It's be a hit.

Bex said...

EWBL, I know EXACTLY what you mean! I've posted stuff before, hit publish and then sat there for hours (still laughing at myself) compulsively hitting refresh on my sitemeter wondering where the hell everyone is!

I read somewhere that when you're writing comedy if you think it's funny then it's probably not. I read that, thought about it for a few minutes and then thought, "Nah...that's not it..."

Physcokity said...

That sounds like it was quite funny. I'd probably have been falling out of my chair with laughter if I were someone who simply heard what your Divine Miss M had said. Especially given the locale. bwahaha.

It's nice to know that the lessons in modesty are sticking!

Rebecca said...

*I* would have commented sooner if I weren't lying in bed nearly DYING of the flu. Do you feel bad for me now? Do ya?

Anyway, I think that was just so adorable! Melody is a royal cutie.

That napkin holder is a brazen hussy.

I think we all know where the shaking cheese was. It was probably nekkid too, and had the decency of hiding because it was too embarrassed to be seen. Or its bottom had been taken off and it was no longer serviceable.

And if that sounds bad, then someone has their mind in the swamp.

Elastic, keep us updated on the kids' play. I'm excited to hear about the happenings!

Staci Schoff said...

Yes - I often think I'm funnier than anybody else seems to. Also, sometimes I think I posted something funny and people get really miffed by it -- like hello, lighten up people!

Nancy Face said...

Well, I DID think it was funny...HMPH!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Oh, I'm just a big, whiny baby.

Carry on and forget this conversation ever took place.

Lauren said...

Elastic, I know how you feel I hate that!

All in all, I thought it was extremely hilarious! Melody is the bomb!!

xDashofPanachex said...

boy, that napkin dispenser doesn't know anything about streaking. Where are the tennis shoes? The trench coat? Come on man, you're letting me down.