Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Welcome To Whacked-Out Conspiracy Theory Wednesday!

I am a master of deductive reasoning.
I recently stumbled upon an amazing discovery that completely explains the many questions swirling around Michael Jackson's ever-changing appearance.......

Michael Jackson is obviously part of the secretive underground society that orchestrated The Pop Star Pigment Exchange Program.
Yes, Michael's been a melanin donor for years, giving white musicians a little color in their lives.
How do I know? Well, I have photographic PROOF, my comrades.

Remember Howard Jones, the super-whitey creator of memorable 80's hits like Things Can Only Get Better and Everlasting Love? Yeah well, he looks a little different now today than when you last saw him.

THIS is the new and improved Howard Jones courtesy of The Pop Star Pigment Exchange Program. Wow, what a difference a few melanin donations can make! No more tanning bed marathons for Mr. Jones now.
I hear Howard Jones is currently looking for employment as Morgan Freeman's stunt double.

*I have insider information that Vanilla Ice is still hoping for some much needed street cred to launch yet another career revival attempt. He's currently enrolled in The Pop Star Pigment Exchange Program and is looking for a record deal under his new stage name, Chocolate Ice*

28 comments:

b. said...

I loved MJ when he was a brotha.

I like Ho Jo better as a brotha too.

Pop star pigment exchange and Chocolate Ice......a SCREAM!!!

glittersmama said...

I heard MC Hammer was looking for a swap.

Millie said...

THIRD!!!!

That's a cryin shame, when folks be throwin away a perfectly good white boy like that.

Rhonda said...

Who's next...Eminem? I guess he'd have to change the spelling of that to M&M.

Melissa said...

Ha! Love Rhonda's comment :)
I got nothin. Just here. Visiting. Jumping into the conversation where I really don't belong... and stuff. Yeah.

Elizabeth-W said...

I'm laughin' pretty hard over here--not quite a LOL, but there was an honest to goodness guffaw.

Elizabeth-W said...

I'm Elizabeth's husband, and I don't see race. I see a restraining order.

Hey It's Di said...

Oh WOW! You are cracking me up and so are the comments. I just snorted out loud and scared everyone around me! I have nothing creative to add and everyone is full of the funny! So I'll just say. . .Hi! How are you?

Lisa said...

Looky here, Elastic! You got E-Dub's husband on your blog!!

Okay--lots of laughing here! Good ol' MJ, such kindness to freely give so much.

damon said...

Vote Obama. Not only is he the pigment swap presidential candidate, he's also a client.

Jami said...

So did MJ also donate his sanity to someone as well as his dark good looks?

jams o donnell said...

Haha I get the feeling that HoJo got the better of that exchange!

Tracy said...

I have always wondered where Micheal's color was going. It's good to know that it's being put to good use.

The difference in Howard Jones is so remarkable! I wouldn't have known him!

Annie said...

LOLUIPM!

nikko said...

I laughed so hard I think I woke up the kids. Oops!

Who knew that there was such a thing as a pigment exchange. My life has certainly been enriched. ;o)

Physcokity said...

LOVE Millie's comment that movie houses my favorite Howard Jones song Like to Get to Know You Well.

I might want to sign up for the pigment exchange. Not only does Ho Jo have a sweet recording career, he also apparently has a successful niche in the ever slowing real estate biz

Where do I sign up?

Physcokity said...

Do you get cross cultural lessons with that pigmentation exchange?

Marianne said...

This is great news, count me in for sure. Do I have to carry a donor card?

Just found your blog through our shared love of Escape to Witch Mountain - finally something good came out of it! You had me at the Cousin It photo.

wynne said...

Hahahaha!

I liked that one.

Howard Jones! Too bad about the hair loss.

And thank heaven that Michael has found a way to give black to society! Er, I mean give back...whatev. Same difference, right?

Millie said...

Oh, I forgot about "Like to get to know you well." It's off to Project Playlist for me!

Millie said...

*pout*

they don't have it.

"You stupid bonehead, I'm gonna activate your dental plan!!"

Alice said...

Tell me true, do you think Chocolate Ice will be stealing beats from 'Queen' also?

Lauren said...

Well, THAT explains everything!!!

Jean Knee said...

wow, Howard has really changed. I think he looks better

ELASTICWAISTBANDLADY said...

Okay, true story time boys and girls.

I almost got smacked in the parking lot I pulled into to take the picture of the Howard Jones truck. Some huss pants(thanks for the vocab psychokity) nearly rammed her car into me because she was yapping on her cell phone and not paying any attention.

The things I do for this blog people!!!!!!!

Nancy Face said...

HEE-LARIOUS! Hahaha! :D

Nancy Face said...

I'm sooo glad you didn't get flattened under that HP's car! :0

Nancy Face said...

Michael Jackson was very nice looking before donating all his melanin. Tsk, tsk...what a shame!