Okay, every Sunday I thumb through the glossy newspaper ad supplements from the various stores. Lately I've noticed a disturbing trend emerging that confirms my hypothesis that the American fashion merchants are launching a conspiratorial plot to unload all the 70's crap they didn't sell the first time around.
You, as a consumer, have the power to stand against such tyrranical clothing evil. Just say NO! to gauzy peasant blouses, ultra cameltoe-inducing gaucho pants, halter-styled jumpsuits, tab collars, cork-wedge platform sandals, and polyester tops with gaudy patterns on it.
Listen, us Infidels have been listening to a lot of Euro music lately and the accompanying videos show a starkly different trend spreading across Europe. From the skinny ties, colored belts, suspenders, and striped T-shirts with colored blazers it's obvious that they're embracing all things circa 1983.
They're bringing 80's back......yeah! So if you suddenly get a hankering for something retro, make sure you set your closet time machine to bypass the 70's era completely.
The oldest mini-Infidel daughters find themselves completely enamored by this group from Denmark called Alphabeat. Think of a Scandinavian version of a Disney High School Musical production with upbeat song material and backed by an unstoppably perky band: That's Alphabeat. The paired boy/girl lead singers ooze super adorability and charm. They're also both too young to have lived the 80's experience. Yet all their videos show that unmistakeable 80's vibe going on.
ALPHABEAT- FASCINATION 3:02
We're also really loving an English band called Black Kids. They're sporting the patented Mr. Rogers pullover cardigan style and belted jumper dresses along with a distinct New Wave-ish sound. One word of caution: casually telling people that you're listening to "The Black Kids" might lead them to some interesting assumptions about you and your racial viewpoints.
BLACK KIDS- I'M NOT GONNA TEACH YOUR BOYFRIEND HOW TO DANCE WITH YOU 3:39
Our favorite Black Kids song!
BLACK KIDS- LOOK AT ME WHEN I ROCK WHICHOO 4:12
As if I needed more evidence to add to my case that the 80's will rise again-check out the Swatch watch knockoffs I scored at Walgreens Drug Store for $2.99. The picture on the left shows my broken, crumbling Swatch watches that cost a hefty $35-50 bucks back in the Swatch heyday. Now look at the Walgreens watches. Do you see much of a difference aside from the huge pricing gap? Nope, neither do I.
You know what time it is? It's 80's time, fool! The store ads may be full of models wearing clothing that appears as though it's straight from the Sonny & Cher collection, but I believe that most consumers are going to shun that and adopt the mantra, "It's 2008 and we think the 80's are great!"
So, Izod Lacoste is back. Checkered Vans are back. Leggings under mini-skirts are back. It's only a matter of time before we're wearing the doofy vest look again with our layered socks while showing off our Steve Perry-inspired mullet hair.
(We're also grooving Infidel-style to this group called Morandi. Apparently, they're the preeminent Romanian pop/techno sound of the moment. Anyway, I swear to you when I saw THIS VIDEO all I could think of was the possible but remote theory that George and Andrew dropped a few love children when touring Romania back in the 80's because these two guys from Morandi are freakin WHAM! incarnate.)