Crappy Broken Formica Countertop With Care, In Hopes That Ed McMahon Would Soon Be There....... Oh, alright, that's MY secret wish.
*Cute Infidel Kid Story Alert!* I repeat: *Cute Infidel Kid Story Alert!*
Had this been a NON-cute Infidel kid story, you would have already felt the urge to roll your eyes and sigh at the shameless Mommy blathering displayed. In the unlikely event of you being forced to actually read someone else's NON-cute Infidel kid story, barf bags will be provided. This has been a message of the National Cute Infidel Kid System. We now return you to your regular blog already in progress.
As soon as Thanksgiving dinner was digested, the fight over the last slice of pumpkin pie was over, and the toilets unclogged on Friday, the kids pounced on the Christmas decorations and busily went to work. They even deftly reconstructed the jillion pieces of our artificial tree with their nimble little fingers sans instructions. Sadly, I can take no credit for their supreme intelligence since I couldn't even install our new toilet seat correctly.
In a few short hours, my little brown elves transformed our home into a twinkling sparkling Grand Christmas Central. The best thing is how the decorations cover up most of the toddler graffiti splayed across the walls around here. Our littlest elf, Melody, impatiently stomped around the house all afternoon with her chubby arms folded across her chest demanding to know where her presents were. She feistily told me, "My stocking has hung there for three whole hours, and Santa Claus hasn't brought me nothing!" We all laughed while Melody marched over to her stocking, turned it upside down, and was amazed to see some forgotten chocolates and hair clippies from last year spill out onto the floor. She triumphantly yelled at us, "See? Santa loves Me, and not YOU. You no have nothing in your stockings. Ha-Ha!"
She's wrong. I looked into mine and found the traditional red cotton lint ball and dead silverfish that I get in my stocking every year.